It's nice that this story's AI hasn't decided genocide is logical.
Sally being a sex worker - though delicately handled - is still the big hint this novel skews a bit older. Yeah, sex is basically the delineator, there... Then profanity. It ain't violence. Even in a cartoon rated for under-10s an alternate universe Superman can burn off President Luthor's head with heat vision...
I didn't know people being hit with flying arms was so important to you! :)
Ha, true. Though it does give me some leeway in terms of violence as well. Even Mechanical Crown, which had a lot of battles, kept its violence mostly off-screen or implied.
Having recently watched Ash vs Evil Dead and now working through the Spartacus series from 2010-ish, executive produced by Sam Raimi, we'll just say that a portal opening and am arm flying out and smacking someone in the head is the type of violent, cartoony dark humor I'm being exposed to these days.
Keeping things off-screen or implied? Y'know that can work. Why, one of Isaac Asimov's most famous series is completely told by a bunch of men sitting in rooms either discussing what happened somewhere else, long ago, or what's going to happen, somewhere else, sometime in the future. This proves that one can write enough material to fill five novels with no action or character development if the underlying ideas are strong enough! Psychohistory and "The Library of Alexandria...in SPACE" are strong concepts and can propel sci-fi of ideas.
No disrespect to Asimov - who was a justly renowned writer of fiction, non-fiction, history, science and analysis, and who has an entire shelf of his volumes in my bookcases - but the man wasn't big on character, and my description of Foundation is accurate.
(Insert rant here on how Foundation IS unfilmable, and I guarantee that Apple TV series - while it might be a good show on its on merits - is going to be an utterly crap adaptation of Foundation, because they're going to be forced to add character subplots like romance and betrayal, and action sequences like battles, NONE of which will be found in any of the Foundation stories Asimov wrote. Also, it's David S. Goyer, and now, to digress - because what's comment from me without a long digression or five? - a quick perusal of Goyer's IMDB (writer) profile and my opinions on his work I've seen...
Krypton - Why? just, why?
Batman v Superman - doesn't understand the characters.
Man of Steel - doesn't understand the characters.
The Dark Knight - doesn't understand the characters, and the individual action was stupid.
Blade: The series - was really bad.
Batman Begins - Actually really good. But, somewhere between this and "The Dark Knight," he forgot what makes Batman "Batman."
Blade Trinity - Got Dracula right...actually got that a 4000 year old creature might not mean "today," when saying "act immediately," but, man, the character work was bad. Not surprised Wesley Snipes punched him on set.
Blade II - well, it's got Danny John Jules in it.
Blade - y'know, I never liked this movie and saw the two sequels under protest with the women I was dating at those times.
Nick Fury: Agent of Shield - the one starring David Hasslehoff. Didn't understand the characters.
Dark City - his best.
Conclusion - every time (but once) Goyer does an adaptation he screws it up because he's too busy trying to put his little twist on the property rather that look at the underlying themes and working with what made the property great to begin with. However, if Goyer actually works on an original idea, he'll come up with something interesting.
Ha! Goyer is an odd one. I actually *really* like Batman Begins and Dark Knight and Blade 1 and 2, but the rest of his stuff is fairly shoddy. Foundation seems to be getting very good reviews, but as you say it's not really possible to adapt it straight because it's inherently uncinematic.
I'm certainly not intending to go gratuitous with anything, but equally this is going to be a story about adults being adults - whereas my previous three books have all had teenage protagonists.
I thoroughly enjoyed this first chapter and look forward to reading more.
I kept feeling that Sally was more Dickensian than 70's with her voluminous skirts etc! (Now I think of it I need to go back and double-check which century that bit was...) The grimness of London and the Thames was really vivid.
I was totally immersed, I enjoyed the AI, and the unfortunate fate of the spell caster.
Nice to have the fantastical element mixed with the SF. Great scene-setting!
It was because of seeing on the overview page that it was partly set in 1970's London.... my brain then skipped over the actual year that you wrote in the prologue 😄
Hi Simon. I've reached you through the Sparkle Summit. I was initially interested in your 'How to write serialised fiction', being an aspiring author and hoping to set up a Substack for serialising the Vampire fiction I've been writing, and through that I was encouraged to start reading your fiction to see serialisation in action. I have really enjoyed this prologue/intro to your triverse and hope to dive into the rest of the series over the coming months.
Thanks, Kat! That's great to hear. I do the 'how to' stuff because I enjoy writing it, but I think having it alongside the actual fiction is helpful. One provides proof of the other!
Hope you enjoy more of the story if you find the time.
On this third read - before returning to the June 7, 2024 chapter - a small detail worthy of comment jumped out this time: Two stars vanishing from the sky. You need to pull a big spell to eat up a couple of stars AND all the light it's already emitted, already radiating through space. It practically implies that an as-yet-undiscovered portal leading farther back in time...
Ok, moving forward to today for the adventures of Kaenamor's arm.
Thanks, Francis! The audio version SHOULD be available on Apple, Spotify and YouTube. I've only just started doing the audio readings, though, so let me know if it's not appearing for you.
I should also note that I'm working my way through the chapters but have a long way to go before they're all available as audio. :)
All NEW chapters are getting audio treatment, though. It's just the archive that is going to take me a while. :D
Hi Lance, and thanks! Hope you enjoy the many, many chapters ahead of you. :P
It's all free to read, though you can grab an ebook version if you take out a paid subscription. Totally optional, but if you have a Kindle or similar it can be an easier way to catch up.
I'm not really a Kindle guy... but I would love to see more voice overs (I understand, though, how much work that might be). I have a long commute.
That said, I just subscribed. I like your price scheme. I'm thinking about trying my hand at an interactive fiction story that I started while teaching my AI & Digital Storytelling class. If it gains traction, I would like to do something similar. Thanks for leading by example!
Coincidently, my story is a space detective story. I tried doing it on LinkedIn and had people vote for what kind story they wanted. I took the top two (Sci-Fi and Mystery) and smushed them together. 😆
I'd love to do more readings! It was fun doing this one. But as you say, it's a huge amount of work. Even keeping it very basic, it still takes a surprising amount of time to read a chapter out loud.
I don't know if you use the Substack app - that actually has a built-in reader, so you can have the app read the chapter to you. I do that with quite few newsletters that I read, as it effectively turns every newsletter into a podcast. Not as good as having a human actually read it, of course, but it's not bad!
This looks interesting, for what it's worth, although it's AI I've been inserting MP4 files converted from docx, made with this converter, in the sub stack chapters of my book. It's pretty easy to do. Not great, but adequate for listening, especially if one is also looking at the text. https://www.zamzar.com/convert/docx-to-doc/
Thanks to everyone who has read this opening - I'll see you next week.
Love your voice!
Thanks! :)
So Sally still might get hit with an arm!
It's nice that this story's AI hasn't decided genocide is logical.
Sally being a sex worker - though delicately handled - is still the big hint this novel skews a bit older. Yeah, sex is basically the delineator, there... Then profanity. It ain't violence. Even in a cartoon rated for under-10s an alternate universe Superman can burn off President Luthor's head with heat vision...
I didn't know people being hit with flying arms was so important to you! :)
Ha, true. Though it does give me some leeway in terms of violence as well. Even Mechanical Crown, which had a lot of battles, kept its violence mostly off-screen or implied.
Having recently watched Ash vs Evil Dead and now working through the Spartacus series from 2010-ish, executive produced by Sam Raimi, we'll just say that a portal opening and am arm flying out and smacking someone in the head is the type of violent, cartoony dark humor I'm being exposed to these days.
Keeping things off-screen or implied? Y'know that can work. Why, one of Isaac Asimov's most famous series is completely told by a bunch of men sitting in rooms either discussing what happened somewhere else, long ago, or what's going to happen, somewhere else, sometime in the future. This proves that one can write enough material to fill five novels with no action or character development if the underlying ideas are strong enough! Psychohistory and "The Library of Alexandria...in SPACE" are strong concepts and can propel sci-fi of ideas.
No disrespect to Asimov - who was a justly renowned writer of fiction, non-fiction, history, science and analysis, and who has an entire shelf of his volumes in my bookcases - but the man wasn't big on character, and my description of Foundation is accurate.
(Insert rant here on how Foundation IS unfilmable, and I guarantee that Apple TV series - while it might be a good show on its on merits - is going to be an utterly crap adaptation of Foundation, because they're going to be forced to add character subplots like romance and betrayal, and action sequences like battles, NONE of which will be found in any of the Foundation stories Asimov wrote. Also, it's David S. Goyer, and now, to digress - because what's comment from me without a long digression or five? - a quick perusal of Goyer's IMDB (writer) profile and my opinions on his work I've seen...
Krypton - Why? just, why?
Batman v Superman - doesn't understand the characters.
Man of Steel - doesn't understand the characters.
The Dark Knight - doesn't understand the characters, and the individual action was stupid.
Blade: The series - was really bad.
Batman Begins - Actually really good. But, somewhere between this and "The Dark Knight," he forgot what makes Batman "Batman."
Blade Trinity - Got Dracula right...actually got that a 4000 year old creature might not mean "today," when saying "act immediately," but, man, the character work was bad. Not surprised Wesley Snipes punched him on set.
Blade II - well, it's got Danny John Jules in it.
Blade - y'know, I never liked this movie and saw the two sequels under protest with the women I was dating at those times.
Nick Fury: Agent of Shield - the one starring David Hasslehoff. Didn't understand the characters.
Dark City - his best.
Conclusion - every time (but once) Goyer does an adaptation he screws it up because he's too busy trying to put his little twist on the property rather that look at the underlying themes and working with what made the property great to begin with. However, if Goyer actually works on an original idea, he'll come up with something interesting.
End of digression)
Ha! Goyer is an odd one. I actually *really* like Batman Begins and Dark Knight and Blade 1 and 2, but the rest of his stuff is fairly shoddy. Foundation seems to be getting very good reviews, but as you say it's not really possible to adapt it straight because it's inherently uncinematic.
I'm certainly not intending to go gratuitous with anything, but equally this is going to be a story about adults being adults - whereas my previous three books have all had teenage protagonists.
I thoroughly enjoyed this first chapter and look forward to reading more.
I kept feeling that Sally was more Dickensian than 70's with her voluminous skirts etc! (Now I think of it I need to go back and double-check which century that bit was...) The grimness of London and the Thames was really vivid.
I was totally immersed, I enjoyed the AI, and the unfortunate fate of the spell caster.
Nice to have the fantastical element mixed with the SF. Great scene-setting!
Lol... laughing at my mistake! Of course it was 1772 not 1972! I was thinking that she seemed quite quaint for a 70's sex worker 😆
It was because of seeing on the overview page that it was partly set in 1970's London.... my brain then skipped over the actual year that you wrote in the prologue 😄
An understandable mistake! The prologue does jump around quite a bit - the main story to come is a bit more rooted in specific periods.
Thanks for reading, Aine! I hope you enjoy the rest. :)
Whoa 🤯 what a great start, Simon! Loving this concept.
Thank you! It's a highly indulgent concept which enables me to both have my cake and eat it, but so far it seems to be working out. :P
Really gripping intro. I enjoyed it.
Thanks for reading, Christen! Hope you enjoy the rest if you get to it. There’s a lot of stories to poke at now. :)
The opening sounds really good. I will listen on. I'm also interested in the book No Adults Allowed by Simon. I found it on Kindle. Cool.
Hi Simon. I've reached you through the Sparkle Summit. I was initially interested in your 'How to write serialised fiction', being an aspiring author and hoping to set up a Substack for serialising the Vampire fiction I've been writing, and through that I was encouraged to start reading your fiction to see serialisation in action. I have really enjoyed this prologue/intro to your triverse and hope to dive into the rest of the series over the coming months.
Thanks, Kat! That's great to hear. I do the 'how to' stuff because I enjoy writing it, but I think having it alongside the actual fiction is helpful. One provides proof of the other!
Hope you enjoy more of the story if you find the time.
Mouth agape when the arm is torn from the socket!!
Thanks for reading!
On this third read - before returning to the June 7, 2024 chapter - a small detail worthy of comment jumped out this time: Two stars vanishing from the sky. You need to pull a big spell to eat up a couple of stars AND all the light it's already emitted, already radiating through space. It practically implies that an as-yet-undiscovered portal leading farther back in time...
Ok, moving forward to today for the adventures of Kaenamor's arm.
👀
Very engaging. Great stuff! I'm curious, is the audio part available on Spotify or other podcast apps?
Thanks, Francis! The audio version SHOULD be available on Apple, Spotify and YouTube. I've only just started doing the audio readings, though, so let me know if it's not appearing for you.
I should also note that I'm working my way through the chapters but have a long way to go before they're all available as audio. :)
All NEW chapters are getting audio treatment, though. It's just the archive that is going to take me a while. :D
Great! Thanks for the feedback and all the best!
Love the accent.. I want to get you to read my books :)
Ha, thanks!
Finally started reading this and glad I did. Great start Simon! Colour me intruiged.
Ah, thanks, Stephen! Really appreciate that. Hope you continue to enjoy. Let me know how you get on, either way!
I've started this from the beginning now, and I love it. Also, I'm wondering if that arm will turn up later. One never knows about that sort of thing.
You're not the only reader hoping for some characters (or parts of characters) to reappear down the line. :D Thanks for reading!
Glad I found you
Welcome!
Well, I’m hooked ... and apparently have some catching up to do.
Hi Lance, and thanks! Hope you enjoy the many, many chapters ahead of you. :P
It's all free to read, though you can grab an ebook version if you take out a paid subscription. Totally optional, but if you have a Kindle or similar it can be an easier way to catch up.
I'm not really a Kindle guy... but I would love to see more voice overs (I understand, though, how much work that might be). I have a long commute.
That said, I just subscribed. I like your price scheme. I'm thinking about trying my hand at an interactive fiction story that I started while teaching my AI & Digital Storytelling class. If it gains traction, I would like to do something similar. Thanks for leading by example!
Coincidently, my story is a space detective story. I tried doing it on LinkedIn and had people vote for what kind story they wanted. I took the top two (Sci-Fi and Mystery) and smushed them together. 😆
Oh, thanks! Much appreciated.
I'd love to do more readings! It was fun doing this one. But as you say, it's a huge amount of work. Even keeping it very basic, it still takes a surprising amount of time to read a chapter out loud.
I don't know if you use the Substack app - that actually has a built-in reader, so you can have the app read the chapter to you. I do that with quite few newsletters that I read, as it effectively turns every newsletter into a podcast. Not as good as having a human actually read it, of course, but it's not bad!
And we definitely need more space detectives. 👍
Oh, right. I forgot about that. Thanks.
Great intro! Looking forward to reading the rest. :)
Thanks, Brian!
This looks interesting, for what it's worth, although it's AI I've been inserting MP4 files converted from docx, made with this converter, in the sub stack chapters of my book. It's pretty easy to do. Not great, but adequate for listening, especially if one is also looking at the text. https://www.zamzar.com/convert/docx-to-doc/