Bonus: Callihan's diary

A glimpse into the mind of the short-lived protagonist

Previously: Detective John Callihan was killed in the line of duty in the summer of ’72. His death set in motion a series of events that would lead his old colleagues at the Specialist Dimensional Command to uncover a conspiracy deep within the Joint Council. As the story moves into 1974, recent events have turned in the SDC’s favour. This week we rewind to previously unread entries of Callihan’s personal diary…

Callihan’s diary

1971
12 July

OK, this is it. First day on the job. The new job. Specialist Dimensional Command! Can’t wait to make a real difference. Passing that detective exam was the best thing I’ve ever done. Other than proposing to Zara. Best work thing, then.

I imagine it’ll be a day of paperwork, finding out where the coffee machine lives, trying to learn everyone’s names. Probably be a week-or-so before I get any real cases and can crack on.

S. D. C. Those three initials! It’s what I’ve been aiming for this whole time, straight out of school. Police is about making a difference - or it is for me, at least - but the SDC is where it’s really at. Cutting edge, conceptually challenging work, that’s tied into the very fabric of society. All societies, not just ours. I’ll have my finger on the beating pulse of the triverse.

I wonder who my new partner is going to be? Can’t wait to find out.

13 July

Well, that was a day. In at the deep end, head first.

Two immediate observations:

1. The SDC office is more…rustic than I expected. Feels like it was put together in the 50s and nobody has gone back to redecorate. Which is probably exactly what happened.

2. My new partner is a grumpy sod.

Yannick Clarke is his name. He must be late-50s? I’d almost guess older, but that wouldn’t make sense with retirement age and how long he’s been on the force. He’s the sort of man whose personality ages his face, if you know what I mean? I like him, though. I mean, he’s not necessarily someone I’d choose to sit down and have a coffee or a pint with, and I suspect it’s going to be best to avoid politics as much as possible, but he knows what he’s talking about. Looked him up and he’s got a good rep - or at least had a good rep a decade-or-two back.

There’s a lot of cynicism there. Maybe I can do something about that.

I think they partnered me with him to see if I’d survive. Shouldn’t be a problem.

We’ve been put straight on a case. A murder, too. A body was found, but carved up and distributed through each of the three dimensions. Which would mean passing it through the portal station somehow. Which raises the usual big questions: how, why and who?

When I got home last night, Zara had prepared me an amazing meal. Some fizz, too, even though we’re a bit tight for cash. She wanted to celebrate my new job properly - which we did. At last I feel like we’re both doing something worthwhile. She always was, of course, but I was always playing catch-up.

It’s going to be hard work. Maybe not as glamorous as I’d pictured it in my head. But worth it? Hell yes.

15 July

Decided to put my diary in a secure place. If I’m going to write about cases, it needs to be secure. And it definitely helps to write about this stuff. Keeping it all up in your head isn’t healthy.

We think we’ve got a lead on the diced-up body. Best we can tell, tracking its progress, we think the body parts were hidden in among frozen food transports. Which is all kinds of wrong.

Can’t tell if Clarke is humouring me or starting to like me. He almost seemed to enjoy himself today. He’s only got a year-or-so left before he can grab retirement, and he seems like the sort to clutch at that as soon as possible. He’ll be out with his pension to enjoy whatever grumpy days he has left.

The rest of the team! I’ve met most of them now, I think. There’s a receptionist, Robin Cole. She’s great - one of those people who is on top of everything and knows how it all slots together. Should probably be paid more. There’s two DSes - Andrew Collins, who seems competent but weirdly introverted, and Caitlin Shaw, who seems lovely if a bit…eager. Haven’t quite got a handle on her yet. On the detectives front there’s Frank Holland, who is a bit of a hot-shot and someone I’d already heard of. Not my kinda guy, but clearly knows his stuff. He’s partnered with Marion Hobb, who seems like she’d rather be some place else. Having just fought to get this gig, I can’t help but find that annoying. There were others on the exam who would have killed for an SDC spot.

Then we’ve got Zoltan Kaminski. Polish, I think. He’s funny, in a hideously grumpy sort of way. Smokes like a chimney. He seems to think the worst of everyone, but as a result always seems oddly cheerful. He’s partnered with Nisha Chakraborty. Really competent, smart. Looking forward to working with them both.

Up top I’ve met a few of the brass. DI Robert Ford welcomed me. He’s brusque, to say the least. But he’s one of those people who you always know where you stand with them. Swears a lot. Haven’t met his counterpart, DI Lois Morgan, yet. Not on the same shifts this month. Who else? Only met Christopher Bakker once, but he seems decent. Reserved, but focused. I like that in a manager.

Yes, I’m using everyone’s full name in an attempt to lodge them properly in my memory.

There’s a DCI by the name of James Miller. Super slick, knows how to work a room. I suspect most of the funding we’ve got is thanks to him working some behind-the-scenes magic and shaking a lot of hands in various fancy buildings.

Yet to meet DCS Walpole. And I doubt I’ll see the Commissioner any time soon.

It’s a good bunch, though. A small team, but I like it that way. More accountability. None of us are small cogs in a big machine. Everything we do matters.

28 July

Went out for a lunchtime coffee with Nisha today. We’d been trying to find the time since I started, but either our shifts haven’t lined up or the workload has been too heavy. Today was the day, so we popped around the corner and grabbed some milky mud. There nearby cafes are really not good.

Nisha is an interesting one. Her background isn’t uncommon - parents came over from India when they were young, so Nisha grew up in London with one foot in each culture. Get the feeling that didn’t always sit well with her. She’s massively driven, and I think felt like she had to move away from some of her heritage if she was going to succeed in Britain. Which is probably about right. A shame.

She’s got a look. I got the feeling she was drilling right into my skull with her eyes. It’s like she was trying to read my mind. Which hopefully she wasn’t able to do. She’s a couple of years older than me, and only passed the exam last year. She we’ve been on similar paths. Of everyone in the SDC, she seems the most switched on (other than Robin, of course). It’s frustrating, in a way - if we’d been partnered up we’d really have been able to motor and get things moving. Instead I’m stuck with an old man who’s ready to retire and she’s putting up with Kaminksi’s grouchy shtick.

Make the best of it, we shall. As always.

17 August

Clarke seems to be warming to me. I mean, don’t get me wrong - he’s still an insufferable git. He’s got prejudices practically tattooed onto his brain. He’s old school in every way. I spend half the day pulling him up on his casual racism, and the rest of the day doing actual detective work. But other than that: he seems to like me. Maybe I can be a good influence. A 20-something role model for a 50-something. Not exactly what I signed up for, but hey.

The whole SDC team made it to the pub last night. First time we’d all been able to make it. Holland seems to have a hollow leg. Talking of which, Nisha could clearly drink just about all of us under the table. I’ve never seen a girl drink so much! Wow. When she parties, she parties hard. Had to step outside for a breather.

Didn’t see Zara - she’d gone to bed by the time I got home, so I slept on the sofa so as not to wake her. And then she’d headed out to work before I got up this morning. Had left me breakfast ready to go on the side in the kitchen. I’ve no idea what god I must have pleased to luck out with her.

20 September

It’s taken a while but I feel like I’m hitting my stride at the SDC. There were some touch-and-go weeks at the start there. Wasn’t sure if I’d made the right decision, despite fighting for it for so long. But I’m feeling better about it now. Working with Clarke gets better all the time - not sure if it’s me or him that’s changing - and the rest of the team are solid. The cases are fascinating and challenging.

Yeah, I think it’ll be OK.

5 November

Started to notice a pattern across some different cases. Well, ‘pattern’ is probably an exaggeration. Could be my imagination. Or me trying to find something big and grandiose to do around the day-to-day.

Inevitably our cases run through the portal station. Too many of them seem to have been due to general corruption in that place. Staff taking bribes. Security looking the other way. A couple of incidents and you’re talking about bad apples - get rid of them and you’re fine. But it’s adding up to too big a number.

Or maybe I’m seeing connections where there’s only coincidence. I’ll keep poking at it. Doesn’t seem worth taking to Clarke or the rest of the team. Might be nothing. Anything I find, I’ll log it. Build up a case file, see where it takes me.

19 December

Fuck. Fuck fuck fuck.

Just got back from the Christmas party.

I say just got back. It’s 4.30am. The party ended just after midnight. A bunch of us stayed for a lock-in at the White Horse. Then everyone else left and it was just me and Nisha. Drinks were had.

Shit shit shit

I offered to walk her home. Why the fuck did I do that?

I’m still drunk. Can feel the hangover kicking in already. I was out of it, so was she. Thought it’d be safer to walk her home, rather than having her stumble back on her own. Trying to do the gentlemanly thing.

I mean, really? Was that it? Fuck, John, be honest in your own fucking diary.

Jesus.

Got back to hers at 1am, I think. Only got back home just now, just after 4. I mean, work it out. Do some maths. Do some fucking detective work to figure that out.

God.

I’ve ruined everything.

25 December

Merry Christmas.

I don’t know what to do.

Part of me wants to come clean. Get it all out in the open. But I don’t know if our engagement could survive that. Or could it? We’re great together. Zara is great. I was an idiot, but it’s done.

One time. Men do this all the time, right? I thought I was better than that, but I guess I’m just human. Not an excuse. Not making excuses. But if it never happens again, then it was a stupid mistake. It doesn’t have to define me, or us.

1973
1 January

Let’s make this a better year. A proper year. I let my guard down last year. My fault entirely. Stupid. Learn from it, move on, be better. Always be better. That’s what I used to tell myself as a kid. Did I forget that?

Be kind, be respectful, be ambitious. Those are the three tenets. Remember that.

3 March

Starting to think I should get this case file in order. It all just keeps piling on, one thing after another. I’m seeing a more organised effort going on at the portal station: there’s a whole railroad there, operating in and around the cargo shipments. It’s almost hidden in plain sight, but invisible because it’s baked into the fabric of the place. It must have been running for years: a third track for illegal transportation. And there’s a common name that keeps coming up, too: Barrindon.

I need to find out more about that company. Who runs it, who finances it. To have got their hooks into the portal station in such a big way raises worrying questions. The portal station is as much Joint Council as it is London transport. It’s key triverse infrastructure.

This might be bigger than I’d realised. They’re moving goods, weapons, even people. It’s gross. There’s a girl that’s missing, who I think might be the key to blowing the whole thing wide open.

I need to be careful. Careful about where I’m sticking my nose, and careful about who I trust.

Might be over-reacting. But I don’t want to put Zara in danger. Or anyone else.

Talking of Zara. I’ve told her about the hiding place for all the files. I’ve split this diary into personal stuff, which I’m keeping elsewhere, and case-related materials. Seems prudent to have someone else know about the whereabouts of the files, even if she doesn’t know what they’re all about.

14 April

When I think back to how Clarke was when I first partnered up with him, I feel almost proud. He’s come a long way. Grumpy as ever, but he’s trying hard. I think I’m getting through to him. Not sure how exactly, maybe it’s just because he likes me. He pauses now, thinks about what he’s saying before he says it. Didn’t think people his age could change, but maybe I was wrong.

17 May

Shit, almost had a relapse. At the White Horse, all of us again, first time this year. Too much to drink, and Nisha was all over me. Just with her eyes at first, then sitting next to me, and hands under the table.

God, it makes me feel horrible, but I wanted her so much. That’s the thing I haven’t come to terms with, haven’t dared to write in here. I regret everything, hate what I did, but I can’t deny that it felt great at the time. Like nothing else. Was that because it was bad? Is that a part of me I’ve never indulged before? Ugh.

Anyway. I left. Came home early. Thank god.

Can’t stop thinking about it. But this time, THIS TIME, I did the right thing.

It’s hard to tell what’s a mistake these days. Maybe the work’s getting into my head.

1 July

I think I’ve got enough. The case is pretty solid. I don’t see how I can go any further on my own: I’m going to have to bring the others in sooner rather than later. Clarke I know I can trust, but I also don’t want to drag him into this when he’s so close to wrapping up and heading off into the pension sunset. Kaminski I’m good with. Nisha I can trust, but I don’t know if I can trust myself.

Which makes me sound like a teenager, but there’s no getting around that.

Holland is probably a no. What about the bosses? I feel like I can trust Bakker and Ford, but it’s impossible to know for sure. The sergeants are good people, but I feel like this would be too big for them.

God, it’s a hard one to call.

Anyway, time to go meet Clarke for a coffee. Quiet day today, hopefully.

---

We’re shifting into a new part of the book (ostensibly, ‘part 4’, though who’s counting?), so I thought it’d be fun to segue with a bonus chapter sitting slightly separate from the main narrative.

Even though he was only in the story for a single chapter, I rather miss John Callihan. In another book he would have been the protagonist, the hero cop that breaks the case wide open. In Triverse he didn’t last long.

Right, let’s do some behind-the-scenes for anyone interested in such things…

Author notes

I always enjoy doing the weird bonus chapters. They’re like palette cleansers, in-between especially dramatic main chapters.

They’re also a chance to break out of the usual narrative structure of the story, such as going first-person in this one. Callihan as a character has loomed large over the main story, despite him being bumped off right at the start. He’s a man who clearly impacted on those around him, and here we get a better sense of how and why, and his perspective on that. He’s a man who wants to be a good man, who wants to do the right thing - but doesn’t always get it right. In fact, sometimes gets it massively wrong.

With some of the other characters - I’m thinking Holland - we have generally unlikeable, unpleasant people who are still capable of doing the right thing. In Callihan we have perhaps the opposite.

After finishing last week’s chapter I did some extensive retooling of the overall plot, and lots of detailing around the next story arc. The arcs are split into years, roughly, although 1973 took up two parts of the book. 1974 is going to be a big one and I needed to tighten things up a bit, relating both to the main plot and also to individual character arcs. That meant going back to some of my original character outlines and tightening the laces to make sure everything was holding together.

This diary chapter was an opportunity to retrospectively re-seed some of those elements. So we have Nisha and Callihan’s affair, which was hinted at in the first part of Triverse but hasn’t been mentioned for a while. We have a glimpse back to what Clarke was like pre-Callihan.

Weirdly, this diary also makes for a slightly weird on-ramp for new readers, given that it re-introduces some of the SDC characters. There are supporting roles in there who we’ve barely seen in the main story. Up until now we’ve focused on the three detective pairings, but that’s going to shift around a bit in the upcoming 1974 chapters. We’ll be seeing more of the bigwigs, and as the SDC receives more funding and expands we’ll meet new characters and see more of some of the other staff.

Continuing the television show model of Triverse, it’s a bit like how a new season of a show often introduces one or two new actors in new roles. They might not survive beyond that season, but it keeps things fresh.

Right, that’s it for today. Thanks for reading and supporting!